December 2011
7 posts
I'm laughing because, if I don't, I'll cry.
I know I shouldn’t take it personally, but when I’m holding a one-year-old in my arms and she looks down my shirt and laughs, I feel like she’s letting me know she’s seen better.
Up on the housetop, I will kill you if you get...
I fucking LOVE Christmas.
January through November is just filler. December is where I LIVE. I start fantasizing about pine trees the day after Thanksgiving and am an avid fan of KOST 103.5’s Christmas letters.
Understandably, I’m a Christmas carol nazi.
So when someone sings the wrong words to any Christmas song, it makes me want to murder a rainbow.
Hence, this...
Maybe she's born with it.
I’ve been interviewing like crazy lately. So much so that LA has simply become a series of buildings in which I don’t work.
Recently, I received some feedback that one of my interviewers did not like that I wore fake eyelashes to my meeting. She found it distracting and inappropriate for the setting.
Obviously I agree that fake eyelashes aren’t acceptable for a business...
Excuse me, but would a homeless person have a...
Dear Bitchface Who Cut in Front of Me & Everyone Else On Line and Then Went Bezerkers and Called Me a Homeless Twat When I Made You Move to the Back, 1. Homeless? I know I was wearing laundry day clothes, but please notice I took the time to match my shoes to my purse to my headband. 2. I spent three hours of my day cleaning up after an elderly German Shepard. I just don’t have the...
Every bottle of gin deserves a hug.
When I got laid off I got fat.
I’m not going to mince words here - I was depressed and, because I didn’t have a puppy to hug, I started hugging a bottle of gin instead. Gin pairs really well with those Mushroom Turnovers from Trader Joe’s. And one thing I wasn’t thinking about in my sadness coma was that those little turnovers are about 7,000 calories each. And also,...
